I Vow to Always Love You
by fun-is-murder
Summary: Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester have been married 6 years in a strong relationship. On March 12th 2015 they were on their way to see Dean's little brother, Sam. When disaster strikes, It leaves one with a broken heart and the other clean slate.
1. Cant Fight This Feeling No more

I Vow To Always Love You

 **IMPORTANT INFORMATION**

This is based on a YouTube video, the vow (Destiel)

 **I do not own supernatural, the music or the idea of the story. I'm just a writer trying to finish the details.**

Type up on YouTube The Vow (Destiel AU Trailer) By casandhumanity

 **Go watch! It is beautiful and I'm thankful that the video has inspired me to write again**. **The person is a brilliant editor to me.**

Song 1, Can't fight this feeling anymore by Reo Speedwagon

Song 2, Awaiting your return by Kevin Macloed

Also, I'm looking for beta, due to not living in an America and I don't know the details of the places. Of course my English is poor too as you can make out.

Enjoy guys!

* * *

Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester have been married 6 years in a strong relationship. On March 12th 2015, they were on their way to see Dean's little brother, Sam. The two end up in a car accident. Dean and Castiel are lucky to be alive, but Castiel doesn't know who Dean is. And to Dean death would have been a better option. Dean will not give up that easily and will fight to win Castiel's heart back.

* * *

 _March 12th 2015_

A 1967 black Chevy Impala erupted the night of route 66, Kansas. The car sped up, making the engine roar along the dirt road. The only thing that could be seen in the night are the bright fog lights on the front of the car, due to the bulge trees concealing the street lamps and the moon hiding behind the thick grey clouds, which were ready to break into a flood at any moment.

 **I can't fight this feeling any longer**

 **And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow**

 **What started out as friendship, has grown stronger**

 **I only wish I had the strength to let it show**

 **I tell myself that I can't hold out forever**

The engine wasn't the only thing interrupting Mother Nature's sleep. The radio fixated in the Impala, blasted out the song 'I can fight this feeling' by Rio Speedwagon.

 **I said there is no reason for my fear**

 **Cause I feel so secure when we're together**

 **You give my life direction**

 **You make everything so clear**

"And even as I wander, I'm keeping you in sight" Dean hummed to himself, as he gently tapped the Impala's steering wheel in rhythm.

Dean's actions didn't go unnoticed. His better half, his love, his Bert to his Ernie; Castiel, who raised an eyebrow at his husband's actions, which of course encouraged Dean even more to carry on singing louder.

 **You're a candle in the window**

"On a cold, dark winter's night. And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might" Dean glanced at Castiel with grin and lightly tapped his husbands leg, then placed his eyes back on the road."Come on." He said breaking his singing voice for a second.

Castiel shook his head, but quickly regretted it as he saw Dean pout. "Dean, I'm not singing this song, I have never fought" Castiel put both hands into a peace sign ad wiggled them down to make air quotation. "My feelings away from you"

 **And I can't fight this feeling anymore**

 **I've forgotten what I started fighting for**

 **It's time to bring this ship into the shore**

 **And throw away the oars, forever**

Dean couldn't help but let out a giggle and shake his head.

 **Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore**

 **I've forgotten what I started fighting for**

 **And if I have to crawl upon the floor**

"Can we put on-" Castiel said

 **Come crashing through your door**

 **Baby, I cant fight this feeling anymore**

"Sorry! What? Can't hear you! Music's too loud" Dean replied in a mocking tone as he cranked the radio up.

 **My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you**

 **I've been running round circle in my mind**

 **And it always seems that I'm Following you, girl**

Castiel couldn't help but look down and give a chuckle, meaning he had lost the debate on music. He wasn't really into the type of music dean listens to, he was more of a classical guy. It was funny to him how he met someone who he felt were the same, but loved completely different things. Castiel always believed that the 'profound bond' he had with Dean stopped little things like taste of music or food get in the way of their love.

Dean's foot let go of the gas and pressed the break slowly, as soon as he came to a junction to turn on to route 26. Once the car stopped, the two looked at each other with love in their eyes.

" I-"

CRASH!

Castiel didn't have time to hear what Dean had to say, instead he saw the front end of a huge truck come straight at the car from behind Dean. Before he could even shout, his life flashed before his eyes. White smoke filled his vision and he was taken back:

 _His first encounter with Dean Winchester at the roadhouse_

Cas.

 _Deans beautiful laugh, when he didn't get his cheesy references_

Cas?

 _The comfort he seeks by just staring into those green eyes_

Cas!

 _The first time they laid to together and made love_

CAS!

 _The butterflies he got every time Dean touched him_

Castiel didn't even blink, but now all he could see was darkness. Someone needed him but he couldn't snap out of his thoughts. The voice sounded desperate but it was unfamiliar. Things started to fade as he tried to concentrate on the voice and find out where and what the source is.

Music took over. It was relaxing. It took the pain away.

"Ca-s" Dean shouted, his voice finally cracking. He couldn't shake him or even help, due to his arm caught in between the seat and the door. His ribs felt like they were on fire. He felt a trickle of blood drip down from his forehead, but chose to ignore it, Because all dean could do is stare in horror at Castiel.

Castiel was in a bad state. His eyes were beginning to swell, his nose was leaking out a brown watery substance with hints of blood. Dean had seen a lot of television to know that it isn't normal.

The music from wagon didn't help dean's tears and he would have laughed at the irony, if he had the strength. The song had no words just a piano. 'Awaiting return' he doesn't know who it's by, but he remembers Castiel showing it on YouTube and him rolling his eyes and telling Castiel; 'Classical is boring'

Dean grunts at the memory and stares out the window in front of him, which he is greeted with darkness. The rain began splatting down on the roof and the window, drowning the music out.

"Cas, I love you"


	2. Listen to your heart

I Vow To Always Love You

IMPORTANT INFORMATION

So here's Chapter 2

This is based on a youtube video: the vow (destiel)

 **I don't own supernatural, the music or the idea of the story. I'm just a writer trying to finish the details.**

The Song through out the piece is 'Listen to your heart lyric by DHT slow version'

Still looking for that beta.

Thank you Tamara510 for the review. Hope you enjoy the next chapter, Hun and to all you Destiel fans too!

Fun fact: Moneta (Mnemosyne) is the Greek goddess of memory and remembrance.

 _Listen to your heart_

Lub

Dub

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Dean groaned. He felt his heart beat hard, but slow in his chest. As his senses slowly returned to him he opened his hazel green eyes; only to regret that choice. The bright lights practically pierced through his eyes and into his skull, causing a sharp pain. Dean could only grumble and let his eyelids drop. He decided to use his other senses; he could hear the machine making aloud beep which was in time with his heart. He felt a soft cloth in his grip, but his left arm felt funny and numb. Dean inhaled through his nose getting the stench of antiseptic and iodine, his mouth felt so dry and he couldn't help but lick his lips.

His heart speeds up and bangs against his rib-cage as the pieces fix together where he was and why he was there. He remembered been on his way to his brother's house and he was laughing with Cas…

Dean shot up. He let out a ragged breathe as it hit him "No, no, no" He muttered, his eyes widening with fear.

He felt an arm grip his shoulder tightly and he hoped that it was Castiel, but when did he have that sort of luck. He met his brother's worried gaze "Sam?" Dean snapped out of it, shaking his head before saying "need to find Cas"

L _istening to your heart_

"You need to relax"

Dean ignored his brother, pushing him away and taking the medical equipment off. He started with blood pressure arm strap and then the heart monitor, which he had wanted to do get rid of the annoying beep since his senses were back. It made one final long beep as he snatched it off his finger.

"No. I need to find my husband"

Sam knew Dean was stubborn, so he took the warning and stepped back. Luckily for Dean he wasn't too seriously injured to worry about the equipment.

Sam had remembered arriving nine hours earlier. He and Jesse spoke with his doctor and had discussed how injured the two were; Dean had a small head wound, that was easily fixed with medical glue. The left arm that had been trapped in the car door had caused a clear bone to break, so now it laid in a white cast, from below his elbow to his knuckles. He had a few bruised ribs, but there were no internal damage, luckily. Sam didn't see how bad Castiel was, but what the doctor made out it was bad. Castiel had spent three hours in ICU, before getting moved. The doctor explained he had a seizure in the ambulance and once it was under controlled he was rushed to have an emergency CT scan. Two hours and lots of coffee later, the doctor came in and told them that Castiel will be moved to head trauma unit in Kansas, once he was 'stable.' Sam hated the way he said 'stable' and how he looked with his sympathetic yellow eyes. Jessica volunteered herself to follow in the ambulance so Castiel had someone and Sam stayed with Dean so wouldn't be alone when awaken. Sam told Jessica to keep him updated.

Four hours had passed before Sam stepped out into the cold air and Jesse called him. It wasn't good news; Castiel had been rushed into surgery.

Sam's heart had drop, he was close to tears. He didn't know what he would say to Dean. Castiel had wormed his way into the Winchester family's heart. He had cons of being to open and honest, he wasn't afraid to speak his mind and he had his pros, which always outweighed the cons. Sam had never seen Dean so happy. He loved that Castiel would walk into the room and Dean's eyes would light up. He hadn't seen that for a long time. Dean's smile and enthusiasm had disappeared when he finally came out to his family about being bisexual at the age of 18. Sam had never seen how pissed off his father was when Dean brought over his first boyfriend. All deans' life he looked up to his dad. He did everything his father asked, so it broke him that day his father disowned him. Dean tried. He had tried his hardest to stay with girls. 'The sex was great, but there was no connection' he had told Sam.

Dean then met Castiel two years later and has been together for seven. At first Sam didn't know whether he liked Castiel, it seemed that he had a shifty past and even though he wears his cards on his sleeves, he still had secrets. However over the years, he had formed a bond of friendship even if it's a little awkward at time, but they still had each other's backs.

"What room?" Dean ordered

Sam was pulled back to reality and he replied flatly "He's not here. He got transferred. Jesse is with him"

"Where?"

"Dean you've been through enough"

"Don't care. Tell me, Sam or I'll search the whole of Kansas"

"How about I speak to your doctor and if he gives you the clear then we'll go"

"Whatever Sammy" Dean flopped on the bed, giving into his younger brother's puppy dog brown eyes.

Dean watched Sam leave the room and then trailed his eyes to the ceiling. His face loosened up and he let a single tear escape his face and his lips turn into a frown. He had only placed fierce calm look for his brother so he wasn't worried and wouldn't ask stupid question like 'are you okay?' Dean didn't do chick flick moments

"Please-" He stopped himself, averting his eyes to the door. He didn't know where to start with God. He could ask for forgiveness or beg right there on his hands on knees, but he wasn't much of a prayer and didn't even believe in the SOB...

But cas did.

'He'll be okay' Dean repeated changing his belief to hope. The sentence ran through his head over and over again, like a broken record. Every time he did the image of Castiel's blooded face flooded his brain. He remembered how pale his skin was and how his lips emerged into a dark purple. Castiel's face was too calm for his liking. If it wasn't for the rise and fall of his chest he would think he was dead.

 _There's nothing else you can do_

"Screw Sam!" Dean muttered as he turned his body and placed his legs over the ledge of the bed. He was still a bit fuzzy and dizzy with drugs they had given him for the pain, so he held on to the hospital bed rail. Once the room stopped tilting, dean made his way to the small cabinet door. He assumed correctly when he bent down and grabbed his clothes with the arm that wasn't in a cast.

Placing the clothes on the bed, Dean hadn't had time to put the curtains around him. He sat on the bed once more and slowly put his black jeans on with one hand and half, as well as staring at the door to make sure no one passed or if Sam came back. He was luckily enough to even be able to button it with one hand. He took the black t-shirt from the side of him, which was much easier than the jeans, but his bruised ribs protested as he lifted his arms up, making him moan in pain. Dean knew he had took longer than he had thought getting dressed, so once he had his black combat boots on and they were tied, he stumbled to the door. He had to leave his plaid shirt and green jacket, just in case Sam came back.

Dean had thought too soon, when he took one step through the door frame, his brother towered over him. He place his right hand on the door for support and the stone cold mask was placed back onto his face "Move Sammy"

Sam rolled his eyes "I spoke to your doctor. He says he'd like to keep you in for a few more hours just-"

"Sam" Dean interrupted with warning

"But as long as you have someone to check up on you, then you are clear to go. But here are a few rules"

"I haven't got time for this"

Sam blocked his brother's movement and because Dean was weak, he couldn't fight back so he just sighed. "One, I'm driving. Two, Once we check on Cas, you have to go rest. Since I'm your brother and know your moves, I took the liberty to grab your medication and have the doctors sign your discharge papers. All you have to do is go up to the desk there and sign it. While I grab your valuables"

 _I don't know where you are going and I Don't know why_

Lub

Dub

Lub

Dub

"Coffee"

Dean took the cup with his working arm. He tried to give Jessica a comforted smile, but his mind was stuck in the past of what went off that night. He took a swig of his coffee. He had been there an hour and he was getting anxious. He had to use all his will power to not rush in there and just hold him. He wanted to whisper in his ear and tell him to stay strong and hold on.

"-are still not letting anyone see him"

Dean only just realized that Jessica had been speaking to him; he looked into Jessica's blue eyes and watched as she brushed her blonde curls from her shoulders. God, he give anything to see Castiel's ocean blue eyes. Behind Jesse he saw the doctor that spoke to him and Sam when they first arrived. He placed the cup on the clean grey floor tiles and stood up slowly, his broken hand resting across his abdomen.

"Dean" Sam and Jessica called, but dean ignore the couple.

A nurse who was coming up from the right corridor saw Dean's face go charging for Doctor Moneta's office. "Sir" The nurse in blue uniform shouted.

Dean Winchester barged into the room, again ignoring the pain in his ribs. He was a grown man he could deal with physical pain. But he was still working on emotional pain.

"Okay, sir" The nurse tried again looking at dean when she entered the room.

"He was in a car crash! Why the hell can't I go see him"

The old man, aka doctor Moneta, didn't even flinch or look up from his papers as the door opened roughly. It wasn't like hadn't dealt with this behavior before. He just hoped he didn't have to call security. He took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes tiredly "Mr…"

"Winchester"

"Mr Winchester" The doctor corrected himself "He suffered a severe blow to the head, which caused the brain to bounce within the cavity wall, causing neurons to stretch and tear. The accumulates between the brain and the dura forms a clot. The surgery went well and the clot was removed before more damage can be done."

"But?"

"There's damage to the temporal lobe if he wakes up there could problems with hearing, his behavior may not to be what you'd expect. Or Castiel may have problems with memory, but that's if he wakes up."

"Can I see hi-m?" Dean croaked, his words breaking.

"Mr Winchester, you look like you been through a lot tonight and I" He sighed changing his mind "Yes, but I advise you to get some rest after. Castiel has a long road of recovery and he'll need you at his side."

"I'll take him down" The nurse bowed her head, feeling regret for shouting and then motioned to the door.

 _Listen to your heart…_

On the way down Dean quickly briefed Sam and Jessica on what the doctor said. Sam and Jesse had let Dean be selfish and let him visit Castiel on his own. He needed the privacy. He looked like he was about to brake.

Dean Sucked in a deep breath, as he slowly turned the door handle with his right hand. Now he was here he felt his chest become heavy and he wanted to turn back, but his heart was begging to see him. The sight was one of Dean's worse nightmares. The room was big and a white curtain covered the sight of Castiel's form. Castiel was still in a critical condition so two nurses sat on the computer outside the curtain. He could do this Dean thought. He opened the curtain and there he laid. His broken baby. He had a bandage wrapped around his head that had small droplets of blood on it. A tube was deep down in his throat and connected to machine on the outside. There were other wires and tubes but Dean tried to dismiss them.

"Hey.." Dean whispered, sitting down on a white plastic chair. He slowly took Castiel's hand and pressed a small kiss.

"You for fight this. You fight not just for me, but for what we have planned. Me and you have been through thick and thin. It can't just end like this, I..I can't lose you." The tears fell down from his face and dripped onto the bed. "I vowed to love you and I vow to take care of your ass, but I can't do that if you don't open your eyes baby. Please. Let me see those blues eyes one more time"

Dean buried his head on the side of the hospital bed. He held onto castiel's hand like his life depended on it "please baby" His words came out as a whimper.

Lub

Dub

Lub –

The heart monitor's loud beeps began to speed up and dean's head snapped up "Cas?"

Warning noises came from the machine and Castiel's body began to shake violently. He was having a seizure. Time seemed to slow down as nurses and doctors surrounded his husband, pushing him out the way. Dean was still in the room, but he was in shock. He felt his brothers present at side of him, but his eyes couldn't stop looking at the medical professionals shadows inside of the curtains that where now closed

 _before you tell him goodbye._


	3. Shattered

I Vow To Always Love You

Oh Chuck! I'm back with chapter three!

Thanks to Rascal, Who has twisted my arm into another chapter. Thank you

 **This is based on a youtube video: the vow (destiel)**

 **I don't own supernatural, the music or the idea of the story. I'm just a writer trying to finish the details.**

The song used in this is Deep purple smoke on the water (Even though in the show it's a mixture of black Sabbath, Deep purple and Metallica). This song is at the beginning. Then at the end is Shattered by trading yesterday.

Still looking for a beta lol

 _The curtains drew open violently, a middle aged doctor with thick grey glasses that matched the colour of his hair, strolled towards dean, his face masked with sympathy._

 _"He's... a... Stable. For the moment" The doctor gave a short pause his voice sounding out of breath from controlling Castiel's sudden convulsions "We'll just have to see"_

 _Dean could only stare into man green eyes, looking for any hope. Shaking his head at the doctor to say 'okay I understand" The doctor brushed past him,leaving Dean to stare at the white curtains once more_

 **But Swiss time was running out**

 **It seemed that we would lose the race**

 **Smoke on the water, fire in the sky**

He doesn't remember getting to the hospital. He doesn't remember getting dressed or even driving. One simple phone call at one in the morning had made his mood turn from gloom to hope.

Dean had been counting: Five weeks, Four days and nine hours since he last spoke to Cas, since he saw his crooked smile, his laugh or even his rough voice. Dean was tired. His patience wearing thin each day. Sam and the doctor's baring the grunt of that. But here Dean Winchester was. Walking down the white corridors with belief that Castiel Winchester was going to be okay.

"Hey?" He heard his brother's voice call behind him. He doesn't remember if he had been there all long or the hospital had call. It didn't matter. Nothing matter; only that Castiel is going to be okay.

Dean's stomach filled with butterflies,as his shakened hand takes hold of the handle of Castiel's door. Sucking in a breath, he felt his brothers present behind him. "time to face the truth" Dean muttered, pushing the door open.

Sam and Dean couldn't believe their eyes. Castiel stood there in flesh and blood looking out the window. It was a shock. Dean licked his lips realizing that Castiel hadn't noticed his or even Sam's present. "how ya' doing?" Dean called out, suddenly, without hesitation or even thoughts.

Castiel turned around and Dean smiled as he couldn't help notice that he was wearing his trench coat over his white shirt and trousers the hospital had provided him with. Dean's smile didn't last log as it turned to a frown and his face scrunched up with fear. Castiel' eyes were missing something important. Something that helped him shone bright from the rest.

Castiel tilted his head, taking a step towards boys. His eyes squinting, trying to read the pair "I don't remember you. I'm sorry"

"What?" Dean was in shock. His husband's words not beginning with a "hello" or "Dean" or even something like "who are you" Dean was shocked at how carefully he chose his words. Castiel's heart and mind was still lost, he knows that now. But it doesn't stop it hurting.

Castiel looked down at the floor then back up at Dean "I don't remember you."

"Yeah, I get that Cas.." Dean snapped without noticing.

"what Dean mean is.. That, what do you mean by.." Sam trailled off letting castiel have little time to finish that sentence.

"By not remembering?" Castiel shrugged "One minute I was at black rock with .my girlfriend..uhh.." Castiel paused, rubbing his head as a migraine started to come on "Meg."

Dean sucked in a breath "I need some air." He shivered at that name. The woman has caused so much pain for Castiel. The girl who he told to walk away and don't look back or he'd put a bullet in her head. And here he sees Castiel Novak not his husband, the guy who was in love with a unicorn.

 **And I've lost who I am, and I can't understand.**

 **Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love, without, love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on.**

 **But I know, all I know, is that the end's beginning.**

 **Who I am from the start, take me home to my heart**.

He could feel himself spiraling. If he didn't leave now he'd find something to take his anger out. "I need air" He called out again, much quieter this time. He swiftly turns on his heal and barges out the room, almost sprinting out of the hospital.

 **Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent.**

 **All this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain.**

 **All is lost, hope remains, and this war's not over.**

 **There's a light, there's the sun, taking all shattered ones.**

 **To the place we belong, and his love will conquer all.**

The fresh air hit him and he placed his hands on his knee as he leaned over. He felt sick to his stomach. He was trying to breathe at a normal human pace, but it isn't working out. The only thought running through his mind was making it worse for himself to let in oxygen; Castiel is lost


End file.
